The First Step

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

I have a confession that isn't the easiest to make as a 40-year-old man – I have a problem with finishing things.

That is to say, I build a lot of personal projects that will never see the light of day. Most of the time I get an idea, a spark ignites a fire that consumes me, and then I end up burnt out before the idea is finished.

I first noticed this as a teenager, when a friend asked why I always left one bite of my sandwich. I casually answered, “I never finish things.” At the time it was brushed off, but looking back I think it was a slip that revealed a problem I’ve wrestled with my whole life.

Now, let me clarify – I do finish things. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be employable in the capacity I am. I’ve also learned something from every one of those projects. I grew, I iterated, and in many ways, even incomplete, those projects were all steps that led me to this journey.

The real issue is with personal projects. I tend to over-scope and over-design, creating a mountain of moving pieces. I hardly ever get through them all before burning out or being distracted by a shiny new idea. And then I’m back where I started.

But not anymore. At least, that’s the plan.
I am embarking on the Journey to End the Cycle (of Incompletion).

The Idea

The idea came to me during yet another burnout spiral, while I was soul-searching about what to do next. Instead of consulting a physician, I had a Chat with GPT.

It suggested something pretty obvious in hindsight: build something small. Keep it scoped so I wouldn’t spiral into endless complexity. More importantly, finish it, release it, get feedback, and build from that experience. At the very least, my “next project” wouldn’t be starting from the same stuck place.

It also reminded me that the vast majority of devs never actually release their projects to the public – and that idea doesn’t sit well with me.
And so, the seed was planted.

But here’s the catch: making something small and releasing it is way harder than it sounds. I overthink everything. Will anyone play it? What am I making this for anyway? Those questions spiral into over-designing, overwhelming myself, burning out, then chasing the next idea.

Rinse. Repeat.

Not this time. This time will be different.

That Lingering Thought…

My silicon shrink slipped in a thought I couldn’t dodge – most developers have a graveyard of unfinished projects like mine. On top of that, most games don’t make their creators much (if any) money.

So what’s the point? The cards feel stacked against solo developers.

But then again, let’s not forget Stardew Valley, Vampire Survivors, and Undertale – all massive successes built by a single person.

So what drives some to release while others hold back? Are we fighting the same battles, or something entirely different? More importantly, why don’t we feel compelled to share what is uniquely ours?

Like the poet with a secret notebook, or the painter with a room full of covered canvases – why do some of us hide our voice, our art?

The short answer is we do it because it’s who we are and what we do. The long answer is for another Log.

The Plan

So, the plan was born: release something small. Build it, finish it, release it. Ready or not, here it comes. (That’s more for myself than you.)

Ship it, or stay stuck in the same cycle forever.

My justification? I’m planning for this to flop. Since the deck is stacked against me, I might as well get a bad hand out of the way and be ready for the next.

It’s going to fail. It’s not going to make back my $40 investment (but who’s counting?). The goal isn’t to release the next big hit. The destination of this Journey is to create a new starting point for every project after this. To break the cycle. To learn along the way.

In that regard, I’ve already gotten my money’s worth. I’ve learned things I never would have otherwise, and the game isn’t even released yet. Who knows what else is ahead?

Everyone celebrates the big successes. But no one talks about the many failures that come first.

You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
You’ll never catch lightning if your bottle isn’t ready.

The Journey Continues

What I’ve built is something I call a digital fidget toy – though, true to form, I’m probably selling it short. It’s not the game I thought would be my first release, but I’ve spent about a month building it in my spare time. I’ll probably spend another month just learning the Google Developer Console and waiting on Production Access.

Right now I’m facing a hurdle: as a new developer I need 12 people to install and test my app for 14 days. Which is… just lovely. I get to drag 12 other people along on this journey to fail with me. (Want to help? [email protected])

I’m planning to post what I’ve learned along the way. I already have a build ready to test, and I’ll keep taking steps forward.

And if you’re facing the same issues, or your own reasons for not releasing what you make – I’d encourage you to identify your next steps too.